Introduction

This blog is a reflection on my relationship with my mother, based on the essay "The Harpy's Child: The page for the children of the narcissistic". It took quite some time to discover that my mother has at least some narcissistic tendencies, and this blog will hopefully help me work through some of my memories in this new light. My hope is that this will be therapeutic to me, and that if anybody stumbles upon this blog that it can help them to heal from their relationship with a narcissist.

My message to anybody who comes across this as the victim of a narc mother: It is not your fault. Nothing you could have been would have been good enough, and you owe it to yourself to recognize this. You did not deserve it. I hope you can come to heal from the abuse you have suffered. You deserve to be loved unconditionally.

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Section 1

Many of my examples and stories will come from difficult, traumatizing moments in my life that were caused by sources other than Sandra. These were times that I should have been able to rely on the support of a loving mother, but they were made exponentially worse by a selfish woman who cared more about herself and the perceptions of others than my health and well-being. " Because her abusiveness is part of a lifelong campaign of control and because she is careful to  rationalize her abuse, it is extremely difficult to explain to other people what is so bad about  her. She’s also careful about when and how she engages in her abuses. She’s very secretive, a  characteristic of almost all abusers (“Don’t wash our dirty laundry in public!”) and will punish  you for telling anyone else what she’s done." - Harpy's Child I'd always struggled with anxiety and depression. It was always swept under the rug. There was an incredible amount of pressure from Sandra for me t...
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